I was in two different restaurants yesterday (yes, it was one of those days), and in each of them I found a wall that I longed to turn into a paper bead. Of course, I realized pretty quickly that even if I'd had access to said walls, I can't roll a wall into a bead. But I've been thinking a lot more about painting my own paper for beads.
I've done some of that. I've made a couple of bead sets that started out as white paper I painted before cutting. More often I've added paint to scrapbook paper to enhance the colors already there. But I'm really longing to experiment more with color and texture and combinations to make beads that are truly original pieces of art.
There's fear there, though. I feel inadequate when it comes to painting. Nothing ever comes out on paper quite the way I'd envisioned it in my head. I realize the more I practice the better I'll get. But that means fighting the voices that tell me I'm inadequate.
I guess that's what all art is about--gathering the courage to leave your mark despite your fear of inadequacy. Maybe even worse than inadequacy is the fear that nothing you have to say is original or necessary. Being an artist--of any kind--means announcing that you believe your imaginings are important.
I choose to believe. I will leave my mark. How about you?